This time of year is beautiful for any number of reasons in the northern hemisphere. The long days, the warm breeze, the ice cream.

But it’s horrendous for one very specific reason. Blackbirds at 3am. Sparrows and tits at 4 am. Graraararar. Pass me the shotgun. Seriously – I love birds at all other hours – but I’d gladly bring birdplague on the lot of them for another hours kip. Luckily I can’t bring birdplague on them – or we’d be overrun with greenfly and spiders. Which might be worse. But presumably if I had the birdplague power I could also summon insectplague and arachnidplague. So it’d be cool.

Which is a round the houses intro to a nice tasty tees tee featuring a nesting bird. Awww… Sweet. I get confused with tasty tees btw – the site says tasty tees, but the url is tasty shirts…